nobody believes me.
no-one takes me seriously when I attempt to explain to them my strange, almost supernatural proclivity for things inexplicably going wrong.
one time, while I was working the door at GUITAR CENTER in Springs with Pete, who was in KEYBOARDS, I went back to his section in order to abscond ourselves for a much-needed lunch break, I walked past a used keyboard and planted a single digit upon said keyboard and nothing happened. Now, if you know anything about how GUITAR CENTER operates, they keep all of their equipment (used or new) powered for customer use. So, when I placed my one finger upon a single key of a used keyboard, and absolutely nothing happened, I had to ask, "Hey Pete, I think something's wrong with this keyboard."
To which he answered, "Yeah, one of the keys is broken."
ONE OF THE KEYS, as in, the only key I placed my finger upon.
It seems that any object which is physically ready to give way to the laws of decay, tends to give way at the precise moment when I want to use it. For example, if there was a chair which had an unstable leg, but is used by a large number of people successfully, the inevitable mishap would occur as fucking soon as I planted my fat ass in said chair. I have witnesses.
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